Several weeks ago, I closed my other blog. The URL and front page are still up, so that the cyber bullies can't use the address—one of them used to grab discarded URLs. I am posting the blog's final entry here as well. This is an appropriate place for it.
(May 15, 2009) This is an unpleasant topic, and I am going to spend as little time on it as possible. The operative word is "try", because I am a talkative soul by nature.
A friend of mine started a blog a few years ago, and was attacked by a very nasty bully in her first week. His vicious comments shook her up so badly that she closed the blog down. In her case, it was a drive-by bully, the kind of nastiness that she characterized as a zoo animal screeching at anyone walking by its cage. Random meanness. I wholly respected my friend's decision to quit, but I also believed (then) that you DON'T STOP blogging because of a cyber bully.
Bullies are unhappy, bored, disturbed, or just plain mean enough to want to take it out on someone else. Bullies are looking for a diversion from their own misery. They will take any attention they can get, even if it's negative attention, and ignoring them usually doesn't make them go away.
For three years I have been stalked by two persistent bullies. One of them is a woman. She is obsessed with the other bully. Fully aware of his hatred for me (and the rest of the world), she is not above using dirty tricks to get his attention. Among her tricks, she has written emails to him in my name and posted comments in my name, and ADMITTED it. She goads him into attacking me. But what makes her a bit unusual for a bully is that she can switch allegiances in the blink of an eye. Just as she is capable of attacking me, she is every bit as capable of reviling him, and has done so exhaustively on her blogs, and on other sites. If this description of her sounds like a contradiction, she is that. You never know where you stand with Susan.
You might be new here and thinking: Oh, boy, two women are having a cat fight! Wrong. Anyone who has read the blogs knows that I have never been a combative blogger. Susan, on the other hand, positively lives to fight. If you go to gretawire.blogs.foxnews.com, you will see her nasty comments, posted under the aliases Suzi, Sammie, Deb, Kay and Jane, among other names. She regularly slams the women commenters on that board for no reason and even attacks the journalist and blogmaster, Greta Susteren, who has called her a "miserable person".
Though Susan and the other (main) bully, Thomas Churchwell, don't have jobs, both are hard at work slurring the reputations of good people. Today, Susan, having nothing else to do, found a post on some blog and accused me of plagiarizing it. She flooded my inbox with vindictive emails all day, sent copies of every email to Bully No. 1, and even wrote that my dog doesn't exist!
To understand why she came unhinged again, you have to know what happened yesterday. I stumbled upon a Tweet of hers, via a link to my blog that I saw on my site meter. When I clicked on her page, I saw this:
Enjoying Churchwell's photos.
12:42 PM Apr 4th from web
In an email to me, Susan tried to pass off the Tweet as "sarcasm." What? To anyone who can read English, or is familiar with the two bullies' long time cyber cat and mouse games, the phrase "enjoying churchwell's photos" had to be a complement. A puzzling and highly contradictory complement, when you consider that Susan has laughed at Churchwell's photography for years. She and many others. I think she was embarrassed and pissed that I saw it, figuring I never would, since I don't usually go to the twitter site, or maybe she just forgot it was on her page.
And her accusation one day later that I plagiarized a blog post? See the paragraph above. This was similar to her attack on me last fall, when she hissed at Churchwell in emails, "I hope you're going to write a post about Scarlett!" I would not intentionally use another author's words, though I have seen it happen, innocently enough, on others' blogs. Like many who use the Internet daily, I read, absorb, AND retain a lot of material, so it's possible that something I read found its way into a post. No one cares if I made a mistake, bully.
Her hypocrisy is mind boggling. She admitted to me once that she copied some author's post to her suzispeaks site, and published it as her own. This was in the fall of 2007. I'm even giving it a voice is because SHE NEEDS TO LOOK IN THE FRICKING MIRROR.
On two separate occasions she has attacked me. Outrageous, mean and vile attacks, considering that I did NOTHING to warrant them, never said one negative thing about her before the first attack (my three-year-old phone message, in which I described her as a "fifth grader" for writing the first blog about the other bully, was private, of course, until he gleefully posted it). Her public attack on me last fall took mean to a whole new level. It was just breathtakingly mean. I was in fact going through a difficult time, and she made me feel like shit. LIBELING me an “alleged photographer" "hatemonger" and "Southern bigot," as she did then, might be worse than calling me a plagiarist. It's hard to say.
Though I knew about her love-hate obsession for the other bully, I was out and out stunned the first time I found out that she betrayed me. Today, it was just as galling, but it doesn't hurt. She is just going to attack anyone who questions her motives about Churchwell. As a bully she is not as obvious as Churchwell, but she is more duplicitous, because she has written about a million blog comments and emails and made about a million phone calls pretending to be my friend.
Susan is a bully and a betrayer, not a friend. And frankly, I don't give a flying rat's ass anymore about her opinion, or Churchwell's.
Last December, I tried to go my merry way. I wanted to have a nice blog. But I didn't want to ruffle the main bully's feathers by doing too much more than trying to keep up the blog. So, I wrote just a few defense posts on my other site, foolishly believing they would stop his constant libel. Meanwhile, I continued to blog here. Until he started attacking me here also, which he has done with stunning regularity. Yet, I mostly left it alone, and asked the friends I emailed to leave it alone, as well. I even was cordial when Susan commented on my site. Her double face galls me.
To sum up this post so far: Today, Bully No. 1, Thomas Churchwell, moved back a tier, and Bully No. 2 moved forward.
Just how long can an average person take abuse from a cyber bully? My friend, who closed her blog, couldn't take it more than a week. Sadly, when children and teens can't take bullying any more, some commit suicide. Churchwell started attacking me for no rational reason in 2006. Bullies target women who are nice. When I wrote my first defense post, he stepped up his attacks on me. I was so sick after those attacks, I ended up in the hospital for three days. Those kind of attacks easily could have KILLED me.
As for the other unsavory aspects of blogging: petty jealousies, cat fights, symbiosis and the rest, I never wanted any of it. If a site I read has some melodrama brewing, I go on to the next feed. When Bully No. 1 put his dirty footprints all over my comment section, I sent his abuse to its own site. You didn't find melodrama happening on this site, because I simply didn't want it.
I'm so freaking done. I'm tired of being polite and taking the high road and being called names by cyber bullies. I'm tired of being betrayed. Susan, by chasing Churchwell for three years, has done more harm to female cyber victims than she will ever understand. I'm tired of the delusional bully Churchwell lying to ensure that people don't like me.
I think right now that there are some really bad people who blog. BAD, ugly sad people. People who are miserable and want to shift the blame off their own sad little lives onto me. People who live to bully others.
Go away, you sad, mean people. And please, don't ever bother me again. I don't want to know you, I don't want your emails, and I don't want to even know you're alive.
To others reading this post, if I have another blog, it will be PRIVATE. This means that you will have a user name and password to read it. If you are unable to substantiate who you are, or refuse to do so, I wouldn't add you even if your name is Donald and your address is Trump Tower. Believe me. You will not be reading another blog of mine if you think it's okay to be pals with a hater.
Finally, to the REAL PEOPLE and FRIENDS who took the time to read my blogs, I sincerely thank you for showing up.
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