In Loony Land

Sometimes, it's better to laugh than to cry...

Scene: A street corner somewhere in New Hamphire circa 1920. A youngster of 17 stands under a gas light on a cold, foggy night, blinking at girls passing by. Soon he spots a lone maiden, pretty and quite demure. He blurts that he is looking for a girl to libel. Not knowing what libel is, but terrified nonetheless, the maiden utters a scream and runs away. The youngster's name is Thomas Churchwell. He has strawberry blond hair that he wears in a mullet. He has beady eyes. He is short. Today he was expelled from the tenth grade after a lying frenzy, then he ran away from home. An alert newspaper reporter riding down the street hears the maiden's scream and instantly recognizes Churchwell from his recent mug shot. "Whoa!" the reporter cries. Climbing down from his buggy, he pulls out a sheet of parchment paper from his overcoat, and a quill, then tethers his snow white horse to the gas light pole. He walks over to the youngster.

Reporter: So, Thomas. You were expelled from high school due to a lying frenzy, then you ran away from home. What are you going to do now?

Thomas: I'm going to Loony Land!

The end.

The above "story" is fiction, just like all the posts on Thomas Churchwell's blog. I have never rolled my eyes as much in my life as when I read his latest piece of fiction about me in the Reader.

Setting the record straight:

On the Cape Cod blog, I sent him an introductory email, because he supposedly was prostrate with grief over Christa Worthington's murder, and I felt sorry for him. Little did I know that he was using her death to get attention. This was unfortunate for me.

I wasn't even AWARE of "SuziQ" until he brought her nasty blog to my attention, his voice choked with persecution. Later, when he accused me of being SuziQ (Susan), I was shocked and annoyed beyond belief.

I did not ask for his phone number. He eagerly gave me the number and asked me to call him.

My first conversations with him definitely were not about phone sex. Once again, he is mixing me up with someone else.

I did not say that I wanted to visit him in NY. He asked if he could come HERE. A total stranger on the Internet! He asked if he could move in with me "for a few weeks" (as he had done with Christa, Jamie and Laurie)! He told me that he wanted to IMPREGNATE me. Ewwww!

The next two lies, which he posts all the time, made me laugh the hardest. He says that I "begged for phone sex" and he replied: "Ok, go ahead." Hilarious. Then he says: "I was just trying to get it over with." {hand clapped to forehead} So, THAT'S why he told me that he ejaculated three times in one day! He was just trying to get it over with...ROTFL!!!!!!!!!!!

One thing is not funny at all. Thomas Churchwell is still obsessed and lying about insignificant conversations that happened three fricking years ago. Facts don't change, no matter how long he tries to spin them in Loony Land!